I miss her - H

I've been looking at earlier videos and photos of baby J, and I miss her. She's growing up so fast! I felt like I tried to savor all the moments and each passing day, and then I look back and I can't believe those days have passed, that my little baby is growing up into a little girl. I still enjoy her a ton, and she constantly surprises me and amazes me, but there's something about that little baby...the purity, the innocence, the joy and sparkle in her eye that I miss. I don't quite know what it is...maybe it's the newness of having a baby, your first one. Maybe it's their complete helplessness and utter dependence on you, that you are the only one in their world that matters. One of the most wonderful experiences is seeing your child light up when they see your face, that they are hardly aware of the world around them, but they are keenly aware of you. Doesn't that just melt your heart? It melts mine.

I wonder how this will be the same and how it will be different for a second child. I hope I'll be able to make time to savor these early moments with each child I end up having. sigh. Time goes by so fast. sigh.